Rep Power: 803

Why the **** is it that the woman can say whatever the **** they want, and we're guilty until proven innocent? What the **** happened to due process, innocent until proven guilty? It's got no ****ing place in family law, and it's total bullshit.
Ever since I stopped staying at the house, next door to her parents, where we both lived, with our kids, she just ****ing snapped. It's not like I left her, she left me, and now she just doesn't want me to be in our kids lives at all. She's just causing as much as she wants, by saying what ever the **** she wants, to whomever the **** she wants, and I'm guilty, until proven innocent.
How the **** do I prove something did or didn't happen, between the 2 of us, or between my son/daughter and I, when it was just the 2 of us? Simple, I can't. SO, I'm guilty, and that's all there is to it.
I say, I should just join the military, and be done with her, but then my son wouldn't have me around at all, which isn't much better than the 3 hours supervised I get now. And, she tells him that I'm going to hurt him, or my daughter.
SO, the other day, I'm going through some discs I have, and found one with some pics of her and I, and well, this is going to get messy. She's accusing me of some really ****ed up , and well, it's time for me to fight fire with fire. Don't ask me to post pics, I won't. LOL.

 
Rep Power: 704

lol, that is some f'd up . 80% of the time divorce ends up as a huge fight (similar to ur situation)

Unless you can get your kids to say that their mom (your ex-wife) beats them on a daily basis, there isnt much you can do (which sucks).


If you dont mind me asking, how did this happen?

 
Rep Power: 634

Bro, the only way to approach this type of situation is to play it calm, be composed, and build up a repoire for yourself in the eyes of the law. Do you have a criminal record? If not, make sure the divorce court hears that. Do you drink/smoke excessivly? If not, make sure the divorce court hears that.

If you're a responsible father with a good reputation, don't worry about what she's spouting off- It's just going to bite her in the ***. Tell your kids that their mom is in a really bad place right now and that they need to be there for her; remind them that if they ever need someone to talk to that they can call you, that you'll be there to listen and support them. You're their father- no child wants to be without their dad.

Dude, the worst thing you could do is "retaliate" somehow, because that will substantiate all of her claims. Even if they aren't true, they've gone from heresey/slader to probable, and then you're hosed.

Whenever she starts yelling at you, tell her that you aren't going to speak to her when she's acting like that. Tell her to come talk to you when she's ready to relax. Ask her nicely to stop telling those horrible things to your childen- if she refuses, tell her that you're going to have your lawyer push for slander and have her labeled as an unfit parent on the basis of personal harassment, immaturity, and conduct unfit for a mother of two.

Dude, you can win this. You can make the best of what's going on. Just remember: ALWAYS KEEP A LEVEL HEAD.

And hey, I'm rooting for ya

 
Rep Power: 803

My kids are 5, and 1. My son is starting to see through her , and my daughter, well, she's not talking in any thing coherent yet.
I don't have a criminal record, I don't smoke, I don't drink, , I don't even drink coffee. BUT, that doesn't matter.
As for her yelling at me, we haven't spoken since before Christmas, because, a couple of my friends here, wouldn't let me stay at our old house over Christmas. They said, there's no way they were going to let me be alone for the first christmas, and so, I stayed there. I went home for some clothes, etc, but that was it. Ever since then, we haven't spoken, aside from me calling her, to TRY and set up seeing my kids, which after Christmas, she wouldn't let me do without her parents there.
Sooo.... basically, I was supposed to sit in that house, by myself, and do nothing. Well, **** that. She was always bitter my the speed at which I had made friends in Kitchener, all of them through my Rabbit, and racing. Then, New Years, I went on a date with a woman I met, and well, we ran into my ex. LOL, she was out with her brother, and one of his friends, and ever since that day, according to her, I've been having an affair. LMAO, when she left at the end of November.

 
Rep Power: 803

As for retaliating, I'm saving any pics of her for when it actually goes to court, and we'll see what happens then. I'm not going to do anything stupid, but I'm not going to sit by and let her try and **** me more.

 
Rep Power: 716

Hire a good lawyer, Rabbit. It's your kids - their worth every penny it costs you. It's unfortunate that your ex-wife seems to be acting with less maturity than your 5-year-old, but A790 is right - play it cool and don't bring yourself down to her level - it'll come right back and biter her in the ***.

Particularly with a good lawyer, the days of family courts siding with the mother over an obviously loving and responsible father are over. Show that you're that loving and responsible parent, and show that you've got more maturity than your ex.

Good luck man.

 
Rep Power: 803

Got a good lawyer, already had to fire one. Got a woman, who's a huge advocate for father's rights. **** the ex, like my lawyer said, any judge will see right through her , and my gf has put in word for me, since she's got 3 young kids.
Still though, fathers get the shaft, and that's all there is to it. Until October, I only get my kids for 4 hours a week. ****ing bullshit.

 
Rep Power: 0

sucks big time....hope it will turn out better

 
Rep Power: 803

Can't get much worse.

 
Rep Power: 639

My mom did the same thing with my dad, dont let her get them cause i hated it!! My mom remarried to some a**hole jerk to... just try to keep them man!

 
Rep Power: 803

I'm not worried, I know where my son will go, if given the choice.

 
Rep Power: 661

I totally agree rabbit. And it isn't only affecting you, It is affecting the rest of the family too. I haven't seen either one of them since we came up just after Em was born, because of the BS she pulled at Christmas I didn't even get a chance to see them. And I know your mom is pissed about this whole thing too.

I know things will work out for you man.

especially when the courts see how you are treating her 3 kids.

PS> and please no pics.... I don't need any mental pics

 
Rep Power: 803

LMFAO, jess, no worries man, no pics. How's Noah? Don't worry, first weekend, we'll all be down there. all 7 of us

 
Rep Power: 661

Noah is doing Awesome, and so is Kay. We are still taking things slow, but we are working on it, amazing how a near death experience of a F*cked up drunk driver can put your life into perspective.

and I cant wait to see all of em LOL. Especially Ev and Em.

 
Rep Power: 803

Yeah, kay was telling me. Well, hopefully you guys work out. And yeah, I can't wait to see the 2 of them, at my house, with Dar's kids. Emily already ****ed Heath's bs, and Emily doesn't even know it.